Fried Chicken Wings and Some Things Don't Change

17 years ago when I was 16 and experienced my first disappointment in my boyfriend, my father somehow sensed something was bothering his usually noisy and never leave him in peace daughter. It was a sunday and I was at the coffee shop where my father was working then and was sitting around mulling in silence over how pissed off I was with my boyfriend (whose existence my father never knew of).At a time like that I would usually be bugging my dad to buy me a bottle of coke when he was having his routine tea time coffee. Seeing his daughter in an unusually pensive mood, he decided to order a bottle of coke for her without having to be pestered into buying one to cheer her up. I remember thinking on that day,how despite having a boyfriend, it is still my dad who cared enough to lift my spirits up.

Fast forward to 17 years later on this night, when again despite being with my current boyfriend for years (and this time with my father's full knowledge and blessings) I was again fuming mad because of my boyfriend's not caring attitude (he is probably thinking his girlfriend is stark raving mad and is a selfish bitch to boot) My father called me to tell me that he has fried some chicken wings for me and left it covered on the coffee table before his one hour drive back to Sepang. He called because he wanted to let me know that he fried the chicken wings for me, his way of making it up to me for not being able to fry them yesterday when I came home hungry and looking forward to some fried chicken wings.

As I ate a chicken wing (even though I have had dinner and a coffee and am trying to slim down) I thought of how some things never change. When I was young and looking for someone who cares, I found it right where it always was: with my dad. When I am grown up and looking for someone who cares again, I found it right where it has always been: with my dad. This realisation is somewhat painful and at the same time comforting. Painful because it seems like no boyfriend will ever be able to know how to comfort me in my time of need regardless of whether they are some fresh 16 year old boy or a supposedly more polished 33 year old man (which means the rest of my life could suck big time). Comforting because as long as dad is here, things will always be ok because there will be a drink of coke and of course some fried chicken wings dished out at the right time by the loving thoughts of a father to his daughter.

Dreams & Ambitions

You remember how in primary school every year the teacher will be asking each and every one of us what are our ambitions? I remember I always used to say something standard like teacher, doctor, policeman, shopkeeper and probably the most creative one inspired by Famous Five was to be a Scientist.

Then in secondary school we all got so sick of it towards the end of our secondary school years the ambitions became stuff like: Professional Caddy and Professional Hitman...

But what are our true dreams and ambitions then? Have we truly managed to reach our goals so far? Is our life really heading to where we want it to be?

I think I am going towards that direction, I may have reached it in a way... I have always expected to be such:

1) Earning my own money
2) Living in the city in my own place
3) Doing adventurous stuff
It all din turned out to be exactly as I dreamed it to be, but I won't change any of it either, maybe add to it as I go along

What I din manage to do in the long run despite having managed to do it the minute I turned 17: DRIVING

What I managed to get along the way that is priceless:
1) Love and support from my family
2) Great friends
3) A compatible guy

Maybe my dreams and ambitions were not sky high... but it could also be time to dream up some more!

Of Celebration and Ageing

Last friday I had dinner with my ex-boss who was leaving her company. Finally after all these years she can now celebrate! Needless to say, the celebration came with a bottle of wine at La Bodega Pavillion.

After that I had teh tarik with another friend from 12 midnight till 3 a.m. The next morning? Woke up early with a flu... the whole weekend in fact was dedicated to recovering from the flu....

Itulah pasal, old people should not prasan that they can still party all night...

Wait Till I Have Time

Last night as I was about to go off from the office, I got a call from an old friend from college, she called to tell me the good news that she is getting married and would like to invite me to her wedding. She was one of the last ladies standing unmarried like myself among our college friends besides this other guy. Of course I was happy for her and asked about all the wedding preparation, as usual I feel very happy for the people who dare to take the plunge and happily sign the rest of their lives away to another person.

Of course when I got back home, I informed my dad who was also invited to the wedding. The shock of my life was that (although I managed to control hensem and didn't sound at all like I was shocked) he asked me "Daughter, other people are getting married, what about you?" in the most conversational tone, that brought me back to the time when I was six and my dad using the same tone asking me why I din want to go to school. Looks like my dad really wanted to know this time (usually it is my mom pestering me till no end about this matter). Of course I laughed and gave the usual reply that I was too busy and I will get married when I have the time. And that was the absolute end of this sensitive topic in the conversation.

Of course, getting married for me is the ultimate step. If I cannot imagine myself being married at all up till today means that I am not ready in one way or another, right? Not willing to make the sacrifice as some people would say or have yet to see the blessings of being a married person. Now of course, I would be missing out on things that are important to me like being pregnant and having kids. This feeling was recently brought on by meeting up with another friend who is pregnant and looking so happy and contented that when you see her, you will go "awww" like a sitcom audience during a touching moment.

The final verdict is that no matter how "awww" it can get on the motherhood front (of course I only like the thought of having a baby but realisticly, tearing my hair out is more likely when thinking of taking care of little children while working fulltime) it is still not possible for me to tip the scale to the marrying side at this moment in this relationship no matter how many external factors appear to be giving me pressure. Ask me why? You will get my standard reply "Wait till I have the time"

Did'nt Know I had a Blog...

This is weird, I was browsing through a friend's blog and decided to make a comment on one of her post and suddenly I discovered that I have a blog.... Talk about not being technology savvy at all!